20060923
surrounded by a million people but i still feel alone.
finally back home and back here. i miss my home and everything around here. and i miss my family. i was so seriously homesick.
it's been a pretty long and draggy two weeks. two weeks of the best range of emotions one can experience in his or her life. i was happy, i was sad. i was lost, i was saved. i felt pain, i felt euphoria. i felt insane, but i was sane.
thanks all for keeping me going, especially those whom i poured my heart out to in the wee hours of the night, entertaining me even though you have assignments to rush and mid-terms to study for. those who tolerated my insanity in the middle of the night when the sugar rush from supper went into my brain. those who were just here, and there.
to be exact, my world crumbled down in a matter of thirty minutes. thirty minutes, which can be short if you're sleeping if away, or long if you're totally pressed for time. it simply crumbled down. i lost my sleep, and found myself in bed with eyes wide open while breakfast was being cooked in the kitchen below. by God's grace, the situation was thankfully salvaged with a solution that seems to be the best way out but i know i've let a whole block of people down. i'm sorry but it was really a hard decision. well, good times don't last and shite happened again. it was not about giving up something for it and being on the verge of losing it. it was simply about the trouble and problems created before it even started. the feeling sucked. big time. but i'm glad to say that as of now, everything is once again resolved and i do hope that the year ahead will be smooth for both!
and i made yet another decision. it wasn't easy, but i decided to go with my heart anyway. it was a hard one, but i didn't want to look back in regret. i want to do something that i'm interested in, and not give up on those just because i have obligations to fulfil. i know it's not going to be easy, but i'll do my best.
thanks for keeping me going! (:
yesterday marked the end of IBG. like FINALLY! as i was telling the deeblockers, no more knocks on the door in the middle of your precious and sweet nap with "(insert name of resident here), come help play (insert name of sport)! we got not enough people!" haha. i played netball (where i almost scored an own goal), volleyball (where i sucked in serving), soccer (wheeee!), touch rugby (where i was captain & i do love the touch girls!) and ran for track (where i almost died in the 400m). although we have not much achievements to speak of, i'm really glad for this experience in IBG! the games allowed us, the freshies, to get to know each other ALOT more, which escalated into tons of supper nights, chit-chats, tv-watching in the lounge and even drinking in the d1 shortwing! of course, we got to know some seniors too! although the times were super cui, i did enjoy myself thoroughly! go dee dynamites! (:
soccer trainings are going at full run! our coach is here finally and he's pretty good! trials and selections are coming soon and i'm so dead! i think i'm quite bad, as compared to some of the other girls in the team but i'm gonna try hard to get in! the trainings are also super cui but every session rocks! and i love my soccer boots! haha. (: goodluck to me!
and for the most important part of my varsity life, my studies! mid-term break is here and it's time to really study! i'm quite behind in my readings and i'm so worried! ): the lectures have been pretty good, as long as i'm not dozing off in them. tutorials are kinda scary though. i'm feel so stressed in class! am i not trying hard enough? or are the rest simply too hardworking? oh dear. got back two assignments for literature and i got a B for both! which is a cap of 3.5. which is not good enough for the first class honours i'm supposed to get! haha. i'm crazy. but yeah, you gotta work harder for your honours yeah? make full use of the mid-term break! you go girl!
home on a Saturday night and it feels good. home-cooked food never tasted better! and for once, it's nice to see the home so crowded! MAF is coming and i had my first dose of mooncakes! bought a box of NICE ones for the parents too! i'm proud of myself! (:
will be back with the photos of the past weeks! till then, -huggs- for everybody! we'll make it through! (:
let's go home.
i miss you, you know?
let me go home.
i've had my run, baby i'm done.
i gotta go home.
group1 soared @ 20:15
xoxo