20041205
too tired?
finally i have the time to be here.
everyday's been whizzing past so fast. and i'm hardly getting any sleep. and i don't even see my family at all. i'm either away at camp or too early or too late to catch them. and even now. i'm facing this motionless computer and typing away. i'm losing touch with everything!
service learning. total chaos. it was good that majority of us turned up. and this couple of them.
they don't turn up just because they overslept and don't feel like going down anymore. like hello? this is a class effort. it's bad enough that you guys hardly contribute anything. don't speak up during class discussions and not even giving a damn about turning up for meetings. and you don't even turn up on the actual day? it's damn irritating. if you've overslept then you can jolly well rush down in a cab. spare a thought for the organising people can? what will happen to the manpower allocation if you just decide not to turn up? i'm so disgusted by the great sense of responsibility you guys have.
and the programme. some major screw-ups. don't know what to say about them. it's like we're trying so hard and yet the others are not doing their part. feel so stretched then. it's like running here and there and trying to pick up all the nitty gritty ends left behind by others. it's that tiring.
and the kids. my goodness. their energy never depletes. they can just run and play and run and play. running after them was so tiring. i like kids. but i decided that kids are the nicest when they are not playing.
and the finale. we were like entertaining ourselves. dancing and dancing away. i'm thankful that it's all over. all the hardwork and all. finally it's come to a good end. but at the same time, there's this feeling of how it could have been done better. there really were many things that we could have planned better and who knows, we could have avoided all the major screw-ups.
EDC. still suffering from that post-camp faitgue. it was really that tiring. just feel totally drained. reached campsite at around midnight? and we went for recce for the night trek. by the time we were ready to sleep, it was already like 3 in the morning? and everyone else was like so busy with this individual activities except for me. then i started stressing about my Obstacle Course. i kept questioning if i had left anything out and think they were irritated by me. hahah. so much that they forced me to turn in.
day 1. felt so stressed up about my activity. it's like i have totally no confidence about it at all. i was just replacing someone as the I/C and i was still pretty unsure of how everything should go. what's more, there was the major shift in manpower allocation. so i was pretty worried. but thanks to all, it worked out fine! it was chaotic lah, but still. at least it went on smoothly. man, i was so relieved after the activity. ((:
Eastravelganza was tiring! my goodness. from Bedok to Bugis to Toa Payoh to Raffles Place. walk walk walk and run run run. almost died. it wasn't just physical fatigue but mental fatigue. i swear that i was still sleepwalking then. hahah.
the rest of the camp was spent as station masters. nothing major. just very tiring. mentally draining.
oh yah. had to like look after the discipline of the cadets. pretty stressful. don't know what to say about that either.
overall i'm just glad that it's over. but i still need more sleep! )):
yesterday. spent the morning doing our tribal identities. haven't sewn in sucha long time. now i know i can sew quite well! hahah. okayy. maybe not quite well but acceptable lah. ((: after that was Red Cross stuff. tiring. reached home after midnight. ahhh!! i need more sleep! )):
today. contact session for the new VIs. it wasn't tiring but i was already very tired so i became more tired. did that sentence make sense? hahah. the new batch of VIs look pretty good. hope they can all make it through together.
steamboat dinner with VIC 01/04. pretty okayy. we were all tired. but guess we had a great time crapping and snapping away. ((: i still love our course lots!
that sums up to Shanz's activities for the past few days. and all that makes Shanz a very tired girl. and Shanz is still tired now. her fingers are typing but her brain seems to have taken a long vacation. she needs to sleep. she needs longer hours of sleep!
everybody seems to be changing. situations now are so different from how things used to be in the past. changes are bound to happen. but i guess what we really need is to understand the other party more. people do things for a reason, right? don't jump to conclusions about that. at least find out what is it that caused sucha decision. understanding is not at all difficult.
or maybe, we are all just too tired to do so.
group1 soared @ 23:55
xoxo